Comments from other people on your weight loss

[2dogs2cats]

Does anyone else really not like getting comments from other people on your weight loss? Even the "you look great...you've lost weight" comments make me want to shut down and end the conversation. I'm not sure why I feel this way or if anyone else feels this way too.

I guess I want people to think I look healthier/thinner but not to actually say it. Maybe it's from years of losing followed by the inevitable gaining back.

 

[desinr-gal]

Does anyone else really not like getting comments from other people on your weight loss? Even the "you look great...you've lost weight" comments make me want to shut down and end the conversation. I'm not sure why I feel this way or if anyone else feels this way too.

I guess I want people to think I look healthier/thinner but not to actually say it. Maybe it's from years of losing followed by the inevitable gaining back.

Ssshhhhh Don't Jinx It!!!

 

[2dogs2cats]

Ssshhhhh Don't Jinx It!!!

I don't know if I'll ever get past that feeling!

 

[jungletech]

Yes, I generally think it's rude to comment on people's weight. You don't really know what is going on and why they lost it. Maybe they have some sort of illness or eating disorder. What if they gain it back. Then what?

 

[GLP1Pharmacist]

I consider it a compliment, people who would mention it to me would be people who care that I was living a healthier life.

 

[2dogs2cats]

Yes, I generally think it's rude to comment on people's weight. You don't really know what is going on and why they lost it. Maybe they have some sort of illness or eating disorder. What if they gain it back. Then what?

That's how I tend to feel too. In the past when I've worked my ass off to lose weight I'm constantly anxious about gaining it back and knowing that people are noticing because they commented when I lost the weight. And I've also lost weight from illness, like you mentioned. People don't want to be reminded that they've been too sick to hold anything down for weeks.

 

[2dogs2cats]

I consider it a compliment, people who would mention it to me would be people who care that I was living a healthier life.

And I think that's definitely how most people mean it. People are for sure being complimentary and definitely not trying make you self-conscious. That's why I feel weird being uncomfortable with the compliments

 

[Sasquatch]

So I've lost 60lbs. in a year. That 5lbs. a month. That's very gradual. So I don't expect anything. But I understand as well. You can't get anything near as personal as chopping off 60lbs. If anything it's like wearing gold-plated underwear. Nobody should know but you.

 

[randompersonrandom]

I've had a weird experience. I'm pretty public about what's going on in my life on social media. I don't include drama, personal struggles, or trauma, but I DO include hobbies, interesting or funny things I've seen, or other stuff I think people reading would be interested in or excited about. I've also been at my job (25,000 people work at the same place as me) for ten years and am in a position where LOTS of people get to know me.) And I let everyone in my real life be friends with me on social media, and an awful lot of them read my social media; more than I ever would have expected, but I guess I do a lot of fun stuff and I always talk about how I got started doing the fun stuff, and am big on the messaging that you don't have to be amazing or talented to do fun stuff, you just pick it up and do it, and maybe you'll get good at it.

Since I've been public about "I'm on magic skinny drugs, and they are working, and I am happy, hooray!", and a sizeable percentage of my 200-plus office and a smaller but vocal percentage of my 25k job knows that it's open knowledge that "randompersonrandom is on glp'1's and is much, much smaller than she used to be!", a number of conversations when I make the rounds in the office or go to meetings with other groups is "LOOK HOW SKINNY YOU ARE" , and me replying "YES, HOORAY FOR GLP1's, GIVE ME ALL OF YOUR DRUGS". so if you haven't read my little essays on "I am on magic skinny shots and here's how it's going," then you're probably overhearing a conversation in an open-office setup about it, so it's considered fair game for everyone to discuss, and of course there are MANY questions, and of course I answer them.

I fully acknowledge that I did this to myself when I chose to be very open about my business, and I'm not really sorry. I'm startled by the number of people I care about who, after seeing my success and talking to me and asking me questions, went and got their own magic skinny shots and are now much happier. But I also will be kind of relieved and content when I've been where I'm going long enough that my weight loss is old news and people are just kind of used to this being what I look like.

 

[2dogs2cats]

So I've lost 60lbs. in a year. That 5lbs. a month. That's very gradual. So I don't expect anything. But I understand as well. You can't get anything near as personal as chopping off 60lbs. If anything it's like wearing gold-plated underwear. Nobody should know but you.

60lbs in a year is amazing! I bet you feel awesome, gold-plated underwear or not . I've been getting more comments from my patients lately, maybe they feel more comfortable being so personal because I already know so much about their bodies and it feels comfortable for them.

 

[2dogs2cats]

I've had a weird experience. I'm pretty public about what's going on in my life on social media. I don't include drama, personal struggles, or trauma, but I DO include hobbies, interesting or funny things I've seen, or other stuff I think people reading would be interested in or excited about. I've also been at my job (25,000 people work at the same place as me) for ten years and am in a position where LOTS of people get to know me.) And I let everyone in my real life be friends with me on social media, and an awful lot of them read my social media; more than I ever would have expected, but I guess I do a lot of fun stuff and I always talk about how I got started doing the fun stuff, and am big on the messaging that you don't have to be amazing or talented to do fun stuff, you just pick it up and do it, and maybe you'll get good at it.

Since I've been public about "I'm on magic skinny drugs, and they are working, and I am happy, hooray!", and a sizeable percentage of my 200-plus office and a smaller but vocal percentage of my 25k job knows that it's open knowledge that "randompersonrandom is on glp'1's and is much, much smaller than she used to be!", a number of conversations when I make the rounds in the office or go to meetings with other groups is "LOOK HOW SKINNY YOU ARE" , and me replying "YES, HOORAY FOR GLP1's, GIVE ME ALL OF YOUR DRUGS". so if you haven't read my little essays on "I am on magic skinny shots and here's how it's going," then you're probably overhearing a conversation in an open-office setup about it, so it's considered fair game for everyone to discuss, and of course there are MANY questions, and of course I answer them.

I fully acknowledge that I did this to myself when I chose to be very open about my business, and I'm not really sorry. I'm startled by the number of people I care about who, after seeing my success and talking to me and asking me questions, went and got their own magic skinny shots and are now much happier. But I also will be kind of relieved and content when I've been where I'm going long enough that my weight loss is old news and people are just kind of used to this being what I look like.

I love this though! I wish I could be as confident and open about my life as you are. It seems like such a freeing way to live. I'm sure you're helping a lot of people improve their lives and that's such a good positive effect to be having on the people around you. But I understand what you're saying about people getting used to your new normal instead of your BIG CHANGE

 

[randompersonrandom]

I love this though! I wish I could be as confident and open about my life as you are. It seems like such a freeing way to live. I'm sure you're helping a lot of people improve their lives and that's such a good positive effect to be having on the people around you. But I understand what you're saying about people getting used to your new normal instead of your BIG CHANGE

Thank you. It's been very good for me overall; I've lived that way for decades, and it's a tradeoff; I don't have as much privacy as people who aren't so forthcoming in spaces where people who are curious can consume it, but people feel like they know me and it's easy to make friends, and people generally assume from the start that they can trust me, which makes my work-life WAY easier as long as I'm super careful not to ever break a trust. But it also means I have to be really careful to make sure I'm not presenting myself as someone that the real me could never live up to; I can't act kinder, more thoughtful, or more generally-wonderful online than I am in real life, or I will disappoint people when they come to talk to me.

 

[randompersonrandom]

So I've lost 60lbs. in a year. That 5lbs. a month. That's very gradual. So I don't expect anything. But I understand as well. You can't get anything near as personal as chopping off 60lbs. If anything it's like wearing gold-plated underwear. Nobody should know but you.

60 pounds in a year is amazing. Honestly, just NOT putting ON 20 pounds in a year is beating some odds.

 

[sheilarae74]

"I'm on magic skinny drugs, and they are working, and I am happy, hooray!"

I LOVE IT!

I am totally gonna use that when somebody comments about my weight loss.

 

[professorpeppy]

I love it..is that bad..

jokes aside i wore a t-shirt for the first time since WL in the office the other day. THREE separate coworkers stopped me to say i look great. lit a little fire inside me, thinking people can finally notice my hard work (well.. me and research reta / tirz.. haha)

walked around like i owned the building all day

 

[Bumblebe 36090]

Does anyone else really not like getting comments from other people on your weight loss? Even the "you look great...you've lost weight" comments make me want to shut down and end the conversation. I'm not sure why I feel this way or if anyone else feels this way too.

I guess I want people to think I look healthier/thinner but not to actually say it. Maybe it's from years of losing followed by the inevitable gaining back.

I feel exactly the same. I just dint want comments on my body ever. Good bad, whatever I interpret all of them negatively and makes me feel weird. This time around I’m saying something like “I know your comment is well meaning but I interpret all comments on my body/ weight negatively. So if you’d like to compliment me please find some other way to do it or just make no comment if you can’t find anything else worth complimenting. Thank you”

 

[cldfront]

My problem with comments like "oh wow, you look SO GOOD" is that it implies that I looked "so bad" before. Or that how I look is somehow more important than who I am. I don't know, it just makes me sad. I get it though. I look dramatically different. It just seems like the thoughts I had in my head about how people were judging me when I was 80+ pounds heavier are all true, and it sucks.

Mostly when people mention I've lost weight I say "yes" and change the subject. "Yes, I've lost weight - how have YOU been?"

 

[2dogs2cats]

My problem with comments like "oh wow, you look SO GOOD" is that it implies that I looked "so bad" before. Or that how I look is somehow more important than who I am. I don't know, it just makes me sad. I get it though. I look dramatically different. It just seems like the thoughts I had in my head about how people were judging me when I was 80+ pounds heavier are all true, and it sucks.

Mostly when people mention I've lost weight I say "yes" and change the subject. "Yes, I've lost weight - how have YOU been?"

It's such a relief to see that other people feel this way, because it feels like you took the thoughts right out of my head. I'm always changing the subject as quickly as I can... "Thanks, I found a great hairstylist who's giving me the best haircuts of my life"

I love it..is that bad..

jokes aside i wore a t-shirt for the first time since WL in the office the other day. THREE separate coworkers stopped me to say i look great. lit a little fire inside me, thinking people can finally notice my hard work (well.. me and research reta / tirz.. haha)

walked around like i owned the building all day

That's awesome! Positive reinforcement really is motivating. I'm so glad you're getting such great response for all your hard work . I definitely think I'm in the minority here and most people are really appreciative about the compliments!

 

[2dogs2cats]

I feel exactly the same. I just dint want comments on my body ever. Good bad, whatever I interpret all of them negatively and makes me feel weird. This time around I’m saying something like “I know your comment is well meaning but I interpret all comments on my body/ weight negatively. So if you’d like to compliment me please find some other way to do it or just make no comment if you can’t find anything else worth complimenting. Thank you”

Me too, my mind takes it negatively either way. I'm working on my anxiety though so I'm optimistic that it will get easier!

 

[randompersonrandom]

Something else to consider, if it's helpful--there ARE some people who are exclaiming over my body and that's the reason they're exclaiming, which is fine for me and I know wouldn't be fine for a lot of people, and that's fine.

But I think the overwhelming majority of people who exclaim are exclaiming over my fantastic good fortune rather than my body itself, because most of us are overweight, everyone's trying not to be overweight, few of us are succeeding, and seeing me bop around and do it without being miserable or putting in ridiculous strain gets people exclaiming because "OH MY GOD, YOU FOUND A WISHING WELL, TELL ME WHERE IT IS AND HOW TO GET TO IT AND WHAT YOU DO WHEN YOU GET THERE."

And that makes me more interested in being patient through the questioning, because their exclamations are about them, and not me. If I DID find a wishing well and I knew that it was solid and secure, of course I'd tell people I liked where I found it and what I threw in it to get my wish.